Well, the testing on Saturday went really well. Even Joe thought things went well, and that’s saying something, as he always has corrections for people. No corrections for anyone! And oh yeah, I passed! So, just 1 year until black belt!
After that we had a seminar, and we learned a new drunken immortal form. It’s one of the 18 most difficult in the system, and I seriously felt like I had been in a car accident on Sunday I was so sore.
I can’t complain, it was an extremely full weekend!
Hi there, yes been gone, I know. I have a perfectly good explanation:
So, Kung Fu is supposed to be 6 months to go from 3rd Brown to 2nd Brown. I am testing to 2nd Brown on Saturday, in only 3 months!!..... and our teacher doesn’t like to let people test early J.
I’ve worked my butt off to be able to do this. Everyone I talked to initially didn’t think I could do it. The material is way more difficult than anything we’ve had to do so far. But I’ve been focused, and I’ve done the best I can do.
Most importantly, it means that my next two tests leading up to black belt will be here in Cincinnati. Which means my parents can come watch.
A lot of this was driven by attending a talk on Shaolin history and heritage called Tales from the Temple by one of the elder masters in our system. One of the things that hit home for me was something he said regarding his father. He regretted that his father never saw him do anything with kung fu before he died. It was never important enough at the time. Since tests for higher degree black belts are closed to the public, I realized that I had only 3 tests left that my own father could attend, and my schedule meant those tests would be in Lexington.
So I decided to try to get the schedule changed, and waiting an extra 3 months at some point to do that just wasn’t an option, especially after learning that dad’s leukemia is starting to wake up again.
So anyways, I’m hoping to be back on a more normal schedule after Saturday, with perhaps a bit more time for things.
We’ll see!
Ok, I’m slow in responding, but here are my 7 things. I don’t have 7 other bloggers to send to, so I’ll be a little anarchist and not do that part………
1.) I could literally swim before I could walk.
2.) I am a complete wuss when it comes to little pain, like bee stings or pinches, but I can take big pain, like broken bones or the like, with no problem. (hehehe, just ask Jen)
3.) I typically prefer my own company to anyone else’s, with the exception of 3 people. (Sorry, no hurt feelings, won’t reveal that here.)
4.) I have difficulty relating to men. Women? No problem!
5.) I truly believe that there is no lower calling than politics. Our current system is nothing like what the founding fathers intended, and it will never get any better while the masses have their current apathetic attitudes. I can’t even stand to listen to most people talk about it.
6.) There are times I have difficulty communicating with people because even I can’t keep up with the ideas that go through my head.
7.) I truly believe that I was born either 200 years too early, or 200 years too late………
I hate telling people “I told you so”, but today I get to do that in a big way.
3 years ago at this point, a friend of mine started dating a woman who was just no good. She was married, not positive about getting divorced, etc. I said, at the time, that this was trouble. I was told that I was too sensitive to everything after my divorce, and I didn’t know what I was talking about.
So this went on for 2 years, and my friend really, really got hurt. Things never progressed the way he wanted them to. He poured out his love and devotion to this woman, and she never really returned it, but she kept him hanging on. He got absolutely crushed. And yet he kept going back for more, wouldn’t listen to any of his friends, etc.
He finally broke things off in a way, but never really gave up on her either. She supposedly was getting back together with her husband, but they talked and what not. I don’t know too many details about that time period because I removed myself from that situation.
Anyways, Friday he finds out that not only did she not get back with her husband, she’s now dating one of our other friends from gaming days. One that we used to be good friends with. (Well, not anymore, eh?)
Complete bitch.
And damn it, I told you so!
The positive part is that hopefully my friend will finally move on and be happy.
| Your Aura is Violet |
 Idealistic and thoughtful, you have the mind and ideas to change the world. And you have the charisma of a great leader, even if you don't always use it! The purpose of your life: saying truths that other people dare not say Famous purples include: Mahatma Gandhi, Martin Luther King, Jr., Susan B. Anthony Careers for you to try: Political Activist, Inventor, Life Coach |
| Your Dominant Intelligence is Linguistic Intelligence |
 You are excellent with words and language. You explain yourself well. An elegant speaker, you can converse well with anyone on the fly. You are also good at remembering information and convicing someone of your point of view. A master of creative phrasing and unique words, you enjoy expanding your vocabulary. You would make a fantastic poet, journalist, writer, teacher, lawyer, politician, or translator. |
Yes, I’ve been absent again. I know. I’m not sure what to do about that.
The truth is this. I’m finding it hard to blog. I know there are certain people reading this now that I feel like I have to watch what I say, and I don’t like that. It makes it really hard for me to use this in the way that I used to use this. There are many things I feel like I can’t talk about here now.
Anyways, brief update on me I guess:
The cold snap sucks for gardening. Nothing more has gotten done, and nothing more can get done. Blech.
Kung Fu is good. Brown belt classes are a whole new level of difficulty. My body is almost used to the new schedule, but not quite. I’m learning my first sword kata, which is awesome. Tonight I get to start learning Ironman training, so I’m expecting lots of bruises.
It seems our social calendar is quite full. I find it hard to admit that I’m ALMOST like Karen in that I feel the need to schedule these on my calendar in Outlook. It’s the only way to keep it straight. I’m not really complaining, as it’s nice to feel like we have tons of people that want to spend time with us.
I took some pictures of the flowerbeds before things started coming up. I’ll try to upload those soon. I’ll take after pictures when the flowers are really going.
Yep, it’s finally that time!
This past weekend was ALL ABOUT spring for me. Saturday we got up and went to visit a few nurseries. It’s difficult to really pick out too much this early, but it was well worth the trip. We stopped for coffee, only to discover that the new coffee place that opened near me is actually owned by a couple that live in our neighborhood! So that was neat. Then, when we couldn’t find any breakfast places near the nursery I wanted to start at, we headed north on Route 22 (Montgomery Rd.). That turned into a nice drive in the country! We went through Morrow, and finally found a little mom and pop place north of there that was serving breakfast. Jen and I both got breakfast sandwiches and a bottle of water, and the whole thing was $5. Can’t beat that.
So, we stopped at Applewood nursery, and didn’t really find much there yet. They were still sitting things out, so it will be worth a trip back in about 2 weeks. So then we stopped by Earthscapes on the way home. They had much more out, and they actually had a few customers too. We picked out a white Iceberg Rose bush to put on top of where I buried Ojos. It’s fitting I think, she loved to hide in rose bushes. We got a few pink Pincushions for Jen, and then picked out the Hardy Orange Flying Dragon. I really can’t wait to see what it looks like. We dropped the plants off at home, then headed to Home Depot. We picked out some flower bulbs and a few tools, and were on our way home.
It was great working in the yard outside all day. We got a lot done, though you wouldn’t necessarily know it by looking at the yard yet J. I got plenty of sun, which I’m happy about. I hate being inside.
Sunday was Fantasy Baseball draft day, another sign it’s spring time J. Greg came over, and we got online to pick our players. It’s basically 2 and half or 3 hours of smack talking. It was good, and I’m happy with my team this year I think. Only time will tell! Baseball starts this weekend!!! Then we hung out for a little bit, and ended up going to my brother’s place for an impromptu cookout.
All in all it was a great spring weekend!!
Well, the past few days have been extraordinarily busy. Jen gave a good recap on the weekend, so I’ll spare you a total recap, except for Sunday.
Sunday I woke up at 6AM so that I could meet up with folks and head down to Lexington for testing. We got down to the dojo early, which was nice. I got to talk to a few of the other students from other parts of the country. We had people there from all over Kentucky, as well as New York and Washington D. C.. Grandmaster Sin The’ arrived fashionably late as always, and things got under way. Now most of the people there were lower belts, so there was a good deal of time where I could do nothing but sit there and wait, which is always great for building anxiety. I finally got called up, and I got through all of my material just fine.
Next was sparring. As always, I sparred with Brian. Now, we were going just a bit harder than we should have been, and the funniest thing happened. I blocked a kick of his, and somehow I hit just right to rip his pants leg open. From groin to knee J. The black belts all started giggling, which was great.
Regardless everything went fine, and I am now a 3rd degree brown belt! Now the fun really starts with class, as things get a lot more difficult!
Well, like I said in Karen’s blog, here are my answers to these questions. (Bold text means I have done this.)
1. Bought everyone in the bar a drink
2. Swam with dolphins
3. Climbed a mountain
4. Taken a Ferrari for a test drive
5. Been inside the Great Pyramid
6. Held a tarantula
7. Taken a candle lit bath with someone
8. Said "I love you" and meant it
9. Hugged a tree
10. Bungee jumped
11. Visited Paris
12. Watched a lightning storm at sea
13. Stayed up all night long and saw the sun rise
14. Seen the Northern Lights
15. Gone to a huge sports game
16. Walked the stairs to the top of the leaning Tower of Pisa
17. Grown and eaten your own vegetables
18. Touched an iceberg
19. Slept under the stars
20. Changed a baby's diaper
21. Taken a trip in a hot air balloon
22. Watched a meteor shower
23. Gotten drunk on champagne
24. Given more than you can afford to charity
25. Looked up at the night sky through a telescope
26. Had an uncontrollable giggling fit at the worst possible moment
27. Had a food fight
28. Bet on a winning horse
29. Asked out a stranger
30. Had a snowball fight
31. Screamed as loudly as you possibly can
32. Held a lamb
33. Seen a total eclipse
34. Ridden a roller coaster
35. Hit a home run
36. Danced like a fool and not cared who was looking
37. Adopted an accent for an entire day
38. Actually felt happy about your life, even for just a moment (every day I come home and Jen is there)
39. Had two hard drives for your computer
40. Visited all 50 states
41. Taken care of someone who was shit faced
42. Had amazing friends
43. Danced with a stranger in a foreign country
44. Watched wild whales
45. Stolen a sign
46. Backpacked in Europe
47. Taken a road-trip
48. Gone rock climbing
49. Midnight walk on the beach
50. Gone sky diving
51. Visited Ireland
52. Been heartbroken longer than you were actually in love
53. In a restaurant, sat at a stranger's table and had a meal with them
54. Visited Japan
55. Milked a cow
56. Alphabetized your CDs
57. Pretended to be a superhero
58. Sung karaoke
59. Lounged around in bed all day
60. Posed nude in front of strangers
61. Gone scuba diving
62. Kissed in the rain
63. Played in the mud
64. Played in the rain
65. Gone to a drive-in theater
66. Visited the Great Wall of China
67. Started a business
68. Fallen in love and not had your heart broken
69. Toured ancient sites
70. Taken a martial arts class
71. Played D&D for more than 6 hours straight
72. Gotten married
73. Been in a movie (Little community service thing, I was one of the crowd)
74. Crashed a party
75. Gotten divorced
76. Gone without food for 5 days
77. Made cookies from scratch
78. Won first prize in a costume contest
79. Ridden a gondola in Venice
80. Gotten a tattoo
81. Rafted the Snake River
82. Been on television news programs as an expert
83. Got flowers for no reason
84. Performed on stage (if school theatre counts)
85. Been to Las Vegas
86. Recorded music
87. Eaten shark
88. Eaten fugu (pufferfish)
89. Had a one-night stand
90. Gone to Thailand
91. Bought a house
92. Been in a combat zone
93. Buried one/both of your parents
94. Been on a cruise ship
95. Spoken more than one language fluently
96. Performed in Rocky Horror Picture Show
97. Raised children
98. Followed your favorite band/singer on tour
99. Taken an exotic bicycle tour in a foreign country
100. Picked up and moved to another city to just start over
101. Walked the Golden Gate Bridge
102. Sang loudly in the car, and didn't stop when you knew someone was looking
103. Had plastic surgery
104. Survived an accident that you shouldn't have survived
105. Wrote articles for a large publication
106. Lost over 100 pounds
107. Held someone while they were having a flashback
108. Piloted an airplane
109. Petted a stingray
110. Broken someone's heart
111. Ridden a bike
112. Won money on a T.V. game show
113. Broken a bone
114. Gone on an African photo safari
115. Had a body part of yours below the neck pierced
116. Fired a rifle, shotgun, or pistol
117. Eaten mushrooms that were gathered in the wild
118. Ridden a horse
119. Had surgery
120. Had a snake as a pet
121. Hiked to the bottom of the Grand Canyon
122. Slept for more than 30 hours over the course of 48 hours
123. Visited more foreign countries than U.S. states
124. Visited all 7 continents
125. Taken a canoe trip that lasted more than 2 days
126. Eaten kangaroo meat
127. Eaten sushi
128. Had your picture in the newspaper
129. Changed someone's mind about something you care deeply about
130. Gone back to school
131. Parasailed
132. Petted a cockroach
133. Eaten fried green tomatoes
134. Read The Iliad and The Odyssey
135. Selected one important author who you missed in school, and read
136. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
137. Skipped all your school reunions
138. Communicated with someone without sharing a common spoken language
139. Been elected to public office
140. Written your own computer language
141. Thought to yourself that you're living your dream
142. Had to put someone you love into hospice care
143. Built your own PC from parts
144. Sold your own artwork to someone who didn't know you
145. Had a booth at a street fair
146. Dyed your hair
147. Been a DJ
148. Shaved your head
149. Caused a car accident
150. Saved someone's life
Additional items:
151. Nearly drowned
152. Ridden out a thunderstorm at sea
153. Gone swimming someplace where you couldn’t see land
154. Experienced “altered consciousness”
155. Woken up in a foreign country and not remembered crossing the border
156. Marched in a parade (In Washington D.C. no less)
157. Taken part in an organized protest
158. Taken a sailboat trip that lasted more than 2 days (7 days, Florida Keys)
159. Gone swimming at night, in the ocean
160. Gone skinny dipping
Well, that’s my list. Still things to get done!
Yep, tomorrow is already the end of February. No, I can’t really believe it either. This year is going to fly by like the last one did.
1) I live very much in the now, and I think that conflicts with an awful lot of people that love to plan for the future.
2) The kitten is slowly turning into a cat, and a good one at that!
3) I’m consistently amazed at people that send things from work email addresses. Do you all really not understand that ALL of it is monitored, and that it’s now MANDATED FEDERALLY that employers keep email for at least 7 years? And that even jokes that seem harmless can get you fired?
4) Part of me is always in another place, another time.
5) I am always disappointed whenever anyone brings up anything political. I can only think of 3 people that can talk intelligently about anything without paraphrasing or ripping off the media on the subject.
6) How do you have any type of consistent and decent life with a partner who’s not there a good portion of the time? Can you have totally separate lives and yet be together? Don’t you really HAVE to have separate lives?
7) Does anybody really know what time it is? Does anybody really care? (The better question is, should we?)
8) Look up some information on a project called Atlantropa. Fascinating, and doomed by politics back in the 1920’s.
9) I believe less and less in democracy every day. I believe more in a true republic or even a truly benevolent dictator. Unfortunately, power attracts the corruptible, so it will never happen. The only people truly worthy to wield power are those who don’t want to do it.
10) I believe the human species ONLY hope long term is space and colonization. If we stay on this planet, we will kill ourselves off one way or another. And sooner rather than later.
Negative:
I find myself frustrated a lot right now. Things aren’t moving fast enough in any one single area of my life, other than Kung Fu where I’m ahead of schedule. It’s not that I try less in anything else, but that’s the only area that I have complete control over what happens. I do the best I can everywhere else, and it feels like I’m waiting. Consistently waiting on someone else to do something, ANYTHING!
Work=boredom right now. I’m waiting for the sales guy to get up to speed so that I have something to do. I take care really good care of my customers, which means I don’t have much to do. It’s a nasty paradox. I study where I can, but the rest of the time is busywork that’s WAY below my skills. But there is so much busywork that I end up working a ton, which sucks.
The new sales guy is annoying. He is so over the top that I can’t listen to him for more than 5 minutes without being sick. All I can say is that it better translate into some good projects, or I’m really going to start questioning the judgement of the people that run the place.
Positive:
With Jen’s house finally getting sold, we can move forward with planning the actual wedding, which we will start doing probably next week. It will take some time to get things set, but it’s nice to finally get started.
Did my taxes over the weekend, and ended up with a pretty decent return this year.
For the first time since I was in high school, I now weigh less than 200lbs.
I found out this weekend that yes, I can break boards with my hands and feet. And do it in front of 150 people too ;). It’s something I never thought I would learn to do! (And I’m going to try concrete before too long……)
I really can’t stand people that are enthusiastic about everything. I’m sorry, but it just seems fake. Do your job, and shut the hell up, I could care less that you are excited to do it. I do mine, and I do it well, but I don’t pester people by telling them how much I love what I do.
There are times I miss being an “ultra geek”. I no longer have 5 or 6 PCs running at my house, and I no longer have spares for friends to play on when they come over. This really isn’t a bad thing, but I definitely don’t learn as much as I used to, if you can believe that. I no longer eat, sleep, and drink tech stuff.
In a rare thing for me, I can’t honestly tell you the last time I was let down by one of my friends. I think this has a lot to do with changing the group I hang out with most of the time. I don’t miss that part of my old life at all.
I find it hard to blog recently. And I’m not sure why.
We hide from ourselves. We tell ourselves that we want certain things, when we don’t. We tell ourselves we don’t want other things, when we really do.
I believe that one of the true definitions of enlightenment is the ability to be completely truthful with oneself. This is not an easy task.
The true bitch of it is this: Even when you can be completely honest with yourself, it’s nearly impossible to find someone else you can share that with! So we play the game of judging what people want to hear vs. what they SHOULD hear.
And when it’s someone really important to you in some way, that leads to hiding things from yourself, simply because there is no other way to do it. You can’t speak the truth without hurting the other person, and you can’t lie to yourself because you know better. So your subconscious starts hiding certain things from you, and eventually the real truth gets muddled down in all the half facts and convenient truths that we tell ourselves to make the path easier. It’s human nature to take the path of least resistance.
I’m no better at this than anyone else, but I at least try to be cognizant of the fact that I AM at times telling people what they want to hear. And I try to find a place in every conversation where I can smoothly switch over the real truth for people that I think CAN handle it.
It’s hard, and sometimes it’s lonely. But ultimately I think the striving for it makes me, and those around me, better.
Other than frigidly cold, the weekend was alright. Jen and I stayed in Friday night after she got home. I made breakfast for her Saturday morning, then we took her car back. I went to the dojo for 2 hours while she napped on the couch and did some laundry. Then Greg, Brian, and Kris came over for some gaming while Jen and Darlene watched a movie. It worked out to be a pretty nice night for everyone really.
Sunday was low key, which was great. We had Jen’s sister up, along with Greg and Brian, to watch the game. I’m glad the Colts won, so now the press can stop harping on Manning. Good stuff all around.
A little under the weather today, just too cold to get moving right. These days really bother my joints. I’m debating class tonight, though the rest of the week doesn’t look any better, so I should probably go regardless.
Howdy, where to start?
It’s been a long week with Jen out of town. I put in a lot of time at work, which is fine. Drove to Indianapolis yesterday for a call. I got to see another friend from California last night, which was good. I put my time in at the dojo, and got a few other things done as well.
Resolution update……. I’ve been good! I can feel the difference in my body already, and it’s a good thing.
Mentally, the nightmares have stopped. I’m still having very vivid dreams like before, but they at least aren’t frightening.
I’ve come to the realization this week that I’m really not missing my past anymore. There have been times when I missed the big group getting together and having fun, but those times have been past for nearly a year now. I’m at peace with myself and the decisions I’ve made. My true friends see this, and they are happy about it. My old group sees me the way that I was, and believe that I need to get back to who I was. They miss getting together and having our large group the way it was.
Why? I didn’t like the person I was then. Why do I want to open old wounds and deal with people I really don’t care for anymore? Why do I want to do these things when I have a new group of friends that doesn’t care who I was then? They care who I am now, and they are good for me. But I’m not doing things the way that some people think I should be, and so therefore I must not be better. I must be holding on to something that’s going to cause me problems with Jen, or with my new life, according to their opinions.
I’ve made peace with my past. I know my mistakes and try to avoid making them now. I’ve put the bad things behind me, and that includes people that aren’t healthy for me. It’s a tough set of choices I’ve had to make. (And yes, I was forced into making them because of the situation, I didn’t want to make them.) But I’ve come through it, I’m better for it, and I’m content with how things turned out. I wish others could see that I’m content and stop trying to interfere with my new life.
My new life is crammed full of good things and good people. And that’s because I chose to make it that way. Everyone has to grow and change, and that’s what I’ve done.
Endings mean new beginnings, even if the ending itself is painful and the beginning is hard to see. But too many of us, myself included, hang on to try to prevent the ending parts. Without death (in a metaphoric type of sense), there cannot be new life. Cut the life support, and get on with your new beginning………………….and learn what it is to be free.
I have, so can you.
Weekend was fine, got lots of visiting in with my friend from California, who leaves today to go back. Hopefully he won’t stay away for another 2 years before he comes back to visit again.
I really appreciate the suggestions that everyone has been giving me regarding sleeping. They are all wonderful thoughts. Unfortunately, I’ve tried them all to no avail.
A few comments on this:
It’s probably stress related, I understand that pretty well. However, I’ll be honest with you all and say that I don’t really FEEL stressed out like I normally do. Sure, I’ve got a few things I’m dealing with like everyone else on the planet, but I really feel like I have a handle on things overall. And most people will tell you that I never really seem to let things get to me, which is true. I have sometimes the problem of NOT caring enough, and letting too much slide. But, I work in a high stress industry, so some of that is an unconscious defense mechanism.
Meditation doesn’t do much for the dreams, but I sure feel better afterwards J.
Caffeine doesn’t seem to have anything to do with it. I’ve tried refraining for several hours before bed, as well as drinking some right before I go to sleep. Neither helps, and neither way causes me to fall asleep or not any faster.
I had some particularly nasty things to say about organized religion, but I’ll save myself from the caustic comments by not posting. Suffice to say, the most bigoted, short-sighted, and downright NASTY people I’ve met in the past two months were hard core Roman Catholics. I’ve never met people who are more conceited and more sure that everyone else’s way is wrong, but not their own. (That’s called pride folks, and it comes before the fall in case you aren’t up on quotable quotes……………)
