What happened..........

Alright, so here’s what happened for those interested.

 

 

After staying at my place two Thursdays ago, Rachel went out of town for the weekend. I didn’t hear from her when she got back. We touched base once or twice last week, mainly at class. In normal conversation, she mentioned several times that she felt like her entire summer was booked, with weddings, going out of town, etc, etc, etc.

 

So, I wasn’t sure if that was a hint that she wasn’t interested. I’m not too savvy in the feminine mystique anymore, if I ever was to begin with. She had plans for the entire holiday weekend, although she was supposed to call on Friday and never did. So I talked to Karen on Sunday and asked for some advice on what to do. Karen confirmed my initial plan of letting Rachel know that I was interested when things slowed down for her, so I crafted the email that I’ve posted below.

 

Start

 

Hi there, hope your visit home was good.

I just wanted to let you know that I've been doing some reflecting the past few days, and our conversation from 10 days ago really stands out in my mind. I felt like we connected on some level, and I really enjoyed being able to share some of my experiences with you. I hope that it was as enjoyable for you as well.

I know your schedule is crazy right now with finals and what not coming up soon. I have a great deal of respect for how hard you are working towards what you want to do. When things calm down for you some, I'd love to take you out for a date if you are willing. I'd like the opportunity to find out what other levels we might connect on.

Good luck on your finals, and getting your papers done. If you need to blow off steam or decompress some, give me a call.

Tom

 

End

 

So I sent that on Sunday evening. Monday afternoon I got an email back from her. I won’t post that here, but it said that she was extremely flattered, and agreed that we connected, but thought that we didn’t connect in the same way. She said she hoped we could still hang out and be friends. I of course replied positively to both, and I apologized if I made her uncomfortable in any way.

 

 

So that’s what happened for those interested. Obviously I’m disappointed, but I’m also going to be realistic about this. She’s the first woman I’ve really asked out since the divorce, which was final 3 years ago this June. So I don’t think I did too bad, and I haven’t jeopardized the friendship I think.

 

I’m happy I didn’t try to play any games, as some suggested I do. That would have made things worse I think. It certainly would have prolonged any uncertainty, and I don’t deal well with that.

 

Eventually I’ll find someone that can handle the straightforward and caring way I approach things, right?